Friday, February 13, 2009

Why the discrimination?

So today a really good friend of mine and me walked down to the beach … There was a bunch of people who were looking at us really weirdly… why? Coz my friend was wearing baby pink tracks and carrying a pale blue balloon.. Now why would that be weird??? Well my friend is a guy..

We passed this group of college boys who yelled “hey homo!”... Why does it bother you who goes around wearing what? Comment on it in private but to actually be so cruel about it.. I wanted to pick a bone with those guys but my friend said it wasn’t worth it and he was getting used to it.

Our society is not a very open minded even about things like live in relationships, sex before marriage, women visiting pubs.. Why even a simple coffee date… so there is no way they will ever accept homosexuality..

There are many open minded people I know who say “hey im cool with it” unless they actually meet gay men or women. When they do actually meet they don’t know how to act around them.. And it ends up being embarrassing for everyone involved. They are people like us… they smile, laugh, cry, hurt the same way as we do.

And these preconceived notions against them are the worst.. Who says gay guys are more sentimental then straight ones? What makes you assume they like boy bands and not heavy metal? The movie DOSTANA was a joke.. It wasn’t one to open the minds of the public but one to make them more prejudiced by giving them a stereotypic behaviour…

And the laws which deem such relationships to be illegal make it even more difficult for the public to accept them... After all if the government cannot recognize them then why should the public? Although when gay activists in India agitate for repealing Article 377 I wonder if they are being counterproductive. If they insist on being seen and heard, we as a society will be compelled to confront them and take a stand

Homosexuality as a concept has been accepted and has existed ever since the days of the greek philosopher Plato.. (The word “platonic” to explain a nonsexual relationship between a man and a woman is an example). There is awareness of forms of alternate sexuality that have long been part of Indian society, like the hijra community. There is acceptance of this, but it comes with very definite prejudices some of which are extended to the gay community.

My friend warned me against writing about this… this is because he thinks that once people read this they would assume I was gay too.. I don’t really care… people can think what they want.. But the heart of the matter is that there is gross injustice meted out to them and they don’t deserve it.. We are born the way we are.. To force someone to change their identity to fit in with the norms of the society is definitely not acceptable.

10 comments:

  1. you pick on the most diverse things to talk about.considering the fact that i have not lived in india in the past five years, i am suprised that you actually know gay men. i think the fact that people admit it to atleast a close group of friends is commendable.

    no matter how far our society becomes open minded most of them cannot accept homosexuality. I admit the concept of it makes me a little wierded out to. it just seems unatural, but i agree the choice should be left up to the induvidual.

    and yea your friend is right, people are going to wonder if your straight or gay. so brace yourself

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  2. i totally agree with you on this issue. I think at least in Chennai most of the gays are in the closet so the situation is not very bad. but out here in Delhi its more open, hence more discrimination. the difficult part of it is when we try to defend them we get la belled as one of them.

    There are ways to squash such rumors now arent there ? :P

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  3. wowzer arts way to support the cause.. ashok sent me the link somehow din expect this outta ya.

    but hey its something i have gotten used to. Im used to snide comments and snips about how i should wear a pink totu..

    it would be nice if people wouldn be so judgemental.at the end as long i dont let it affect my induviduality it shouldn matte.

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  4. We have a very good culture at our hands..and homosexuality is not a part of it...so why go for homosex?i'l never be open minded with this issue..cuz i am not open minded with girls going to night pubs,getting drunk and all the crap that follows it...so,will i ever talk abt the discrimination that that the homosexuals undergo???

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  5. so what you sangaa are trying to say is it is okay for men to go get drunk, partying late into the night but not right for women? dude am sorry that is no Neanderthal. you my friend are a chauvanistic idiot.

    and homosexuality is not a disease. its not like they are murders or rapists or thiefs... its education close minded people like you who are a distress to this society..sapho

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  6. its not a part of our culture? you would think so.. i can cite examples from many ancient literature that homosexuality has been existent in our country for centuries. Please don't make statements for which you don't have proof. every single person has the right to equality. who we love should not be an issue.

    see the movie MILK you will understand the whole issue better. i understand most guys like you cannot accept people lik us coz we are not straight. Its okay! you are an old fashioned kinda guy.. But seriously way wrong abt the whole women thing... hope you don have a gf coz she will have your head..

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  7. OMG i cant believe you... so what you are saying is tat since i donot have a y chromosome i am not allowed to go and get drunk or go to pubs?

    i can understand if by principle you are against the whole idea but insinuating its right for men and not women tats soooooo wrong.... they are right you are a chauvinist.

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  8. Talk about Indians and their open-mindedness, its a big joke. Indians is one of the most racist kinds in the world as well as one of the most intolerant lot. I have been part of college groups, work places and there is always someone who doesn't miss a chance to pass a comment or 2 & bring down a character. It happens in Indian cinemas as well; all in the name of joke. While Englishmen were racially abusing African blacks, we have been all along abusing our own fellow countrymen no matter what caste, creed, sex or race.

    Personally I regard homosexuality as an abnormal behaviour and so is the obsession to sex with even opposite gender. These are actions borne out of desperation.

    I have had 3 encounters with men making sexual advances and twice I was clueless as to how to get out of it since I was very young at that time. Third time, it was a polite request to get out of my bike. It was just amazing to me at that time how prevalent it is all around us and how people dared to approach strangers like that. I doubt if people could dare do that with the same casualness as they did to me with the opposite sex. There will definitely be a fear of public outcry. I tell you these can turn out to be one of those social stigmas that has a disatrous psychological effect on the being.

    You simply cannot have a child borne out of a relationship with the same sex; so definitely this kind of relationship is against what nature has defined for mankind. But man historically has never respected the laws of nature, isn't it. They destroy trees, make holes in ozone, construct dams to disrupt the natural flow of rivers, kill animal species, commit all kinds of attrocities and finally dare to have sex with animals.

    Summarily I conclude that homosexuality is the case of taking things to another level by man who has historically never shied away from experimenting, it is avoidable and unhealthy according to me but choice should be left out to the 2,3 or 4 individual practicing it mutually. We Indians should strive to become more tolerant. I am against community garnering public support for this.

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  9. this seems to be developing into a serious debate.. i understand your concerns shankar.. but i would like to question your line of argument...

    "You simply cannot have a child borne out of a relationship with the same sex; so definitely this kind of relationship is against what nature has defined for mankind."

    What you are saying is sex is just a tool to procreate.. if that were true then people need not indulge in anything except the actual act of coupling.. is that how the majority of the world view sex?? no most of them view it as somethin which brings intimacy between two people. if you are right then it wouldn be somethin people indulged in a regular basis it would be seen as an act carried out at a certain point in the "marriage" so that a child is conceived.

    It is sad that some of the homosexuals are very forward, but that does not mean you can brand us as a group. that is just not being fair.

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  10. oh boy! u pick like issues that bum even the likes of shabana azmi and arundhati roy out...

    humor me child.. am tired, and i need to read about raindrops and roses and whiskers on kittens.. and crap lik dat...

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