First Love - II

This year i promise to write more,that is my resolution. at least one post a month minimum.. Senthil pointed out i should complete this story. It is a little abrupt my previous attempt. So i tried to write. But this story cannot end in two chapters.. But here is the next part. So let me know if it is too cinematic.

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Why do I like her so much?" he wondered.. He shuddered as it occurred to him that it really didn‟t seem like just friendship anymore. It was more, more passionate, more emotional, more energizing, more draining… at that moment, he wasn‟t sure it had ever been just friendship between them.

He caught sight of her surrounded by screaming kids, strapping a helmet on her niece teaching her to ride a bicycle. He smiled fondly. She was so methodical with some things. She wore his helmet religiously and nagged him about his when they went out because he hated wearing the helmet. He shook his head but didn't look away. She was a study in contrasts, and the puzzle-like appeal of it was impossible for him to resist. He knew that she could throw a ball, shoot pool, curse or pick a fight as well as any guys he knew. At the same time she could be a kind, caring no nonsense girl who shrieks so loudly at the sight of a tiny cockroach that she often goes supersonic.

As he got closer to her, she looked up, her eyes almost immediately settling on him.
He felt his heart beat hard a couple of times, and he had to draw a breath, because for a second, he was short on air. Then she smiled that half smile of hers, the laugh lines at her eyes and mouth appearing, before she gave a quick wink. She then ducked her head turning her back and continued playing with the kids.

He swallowed hard. That wink had been for him. Crystal-clear revelation struck him like a bolt of summer lightning sizzling through the chill December air. He wanted her with him, wanted her badly. Needed her as a partner, and not just at an intellectual level but at an emotional level. Craved her as as companion more than he'd ever jonesed over getting tendulkar's autograph or that first taste of beer. Connected with her in so many ways that he couldn't see a way to untangle himself and didn't even want to try.

She loved him. He believed it. He had also believed he didn't have it in himself to love her like she deserved. It wasn't her fault. There was so much pain connecting him to the past, a tenuous lingering link to past tragedies, that he had skipped right over the obvious signs. He'd been too busy grappling with letting go of what was gone and wondering if he has any right to grab hold of what was in front of him.

But he wanted to feel that inside him so badly he could barely stay still. It was like this more and more often, feeling like he just couldn‟t breathe without her. But could he just let himself fall freely.. be sure that she would catch him? Did he have it in him to take the risk?.. He needed to think, examine and critically analyse.